Kiss My Size 10 Rear End

Dear Weight Loss Industry,

 While I understand your desire to play on female insecurities regarding our weight and size in an effort to generate massive amounts of money while pumping highly ineffective and dangerous means into our bodies, I’ll stick with going to the gym every day. While I can understand your ploy to play on “thin is in”, I’d much rather be healthy, thankyouverymuch. I get that you make BILLIONS of dollars a year by creating massive amounts of anxiety surrounding our weight and size, but I’m perfectly happy with my kick-ass, size 10 curves and J-Lo looking booty. I will not give myself an anxiety attack because I ate a freaking cupcake. I will not feel fat and gross while eating it. I will eat the bloody cupcake and I WILL ENJOY it! I will not be convinced that I can eat 14 of them and not gain any weight if I freaking inject myself with suchandsuch and/or drink suchandsuch or join some weight loss group that teaches us how to count calories but not balanced nutrition and the importance of physical activity. I will NOT be bullied by your plastic surgery commercials. I am not convinced if I go there it will fix everything and I will be “all better”. I will not buy into your shameful and despicable campaign to tear me down while posing as an ad that can build me up.  I will love myself. I will love my curves. I will make peace with my hips, because they are mine and I happen to love myself. Because WE are gorgeous. We are beautiful; and it is not f-ing defined by our size or our weight, it’s defined by who we are and what we do. I will ALWAYS strive to be healthy, screw being thin. And I will not sit here for one moment longer and allow you to cram your B.S. down my throat. So you can take your self-deprecating-anorexia-creating industry and Shove It Up Your Ass.

Regards,
D.K. Saxton
Size 10 and f-ing proud of it.

Cupcake's Rules for Life

Cupcake's Rules for Life

1. Life begins at the end of your comfort zone. So live a little. Or, even better, A LOT!
2. Try everything once. Twice if you didn’t like it the first time, just in case.
3. Remember: If you got up the tree, you can get down it.
4. If you keep doing what you’ve been doing, you’ll keep getting what you’ve been getting. No different.
5. When things get too complicated, just ask yourself “How did the pioneers do it?”
6. If the tiara fits, wear it!!
7. No well-behaved person ever made history.
8. You can’t win the lottery unless you play. So take a chance.
9. “SEIZE THE DAY!” does not necessarily have to include the morning portion of it.
10. The best way out is always through. The tide ALWAYS turns.
11. Do what you love. It’s what you were meant to do.
12. Be yourself. Everybody else is already taken.
13. If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun!
14. Who cares what anyone else thinks of you? You’re the one who has to live with yourself!
15. EVERY flower that blooms has to go through a whole lot of dirt.
16. To thine own self be NICE.
17. People will hate you, rate you, shake you, and break you. But how strong you stand is what makes you!
18. That little voice in your head that says “go buy shoes”. That’s the one to listen to.
19.  There’s no problem that a TRUE friend cannot confront, combat, plot against, ignore, make fun of, drown in chocolate sauce or run over with a car.
20. Don’t shop for Kiwi’s in a shoe store. Meaning, don’t look for something somewhere it doesn’t exist.
21. Become the change you want to see.
22. NEVER, EVER, EVER be afraid to fight for what you want, your hearts desire, whatever that may be; even if that means fighting with those you love. You might not win, but you certainly won't loose out on knowing what would have happened if you had tried.
23. Life's too short, eat dessert first. Preferably a cupcake.
24. People are like fruit, some are good, some are rotten. Avoid bad banana people. AT ALL COSTS!
25. Finally, remember to always be “Sassy, Classy, and A Little Bad Assy”!!